Five Date-Worthy Classic Board Games

You know you left a closet like this at your parents’ house.

It’s true: board games are old-fashioned. The increased popularity and social acceptance of video games have largely rendered board games antiquated, irrelevant, and cute. It seems tough to come up with one good reason to break out any of the classics that are collecting dust in the closet.

Oh, but there is indeed a great one: many women enjoy such board games. Especially on a date. Yes, they are old-fashioned and cute. Yes, they are corny and wholesome. Yes, playing such relics feels a bit ironic. All of these reasons are why so many women love them.

Date Night at the Senior Center

While many women do indeed play video games, chances are less than great that every date you go on will be with a woman of this sort. And, whether you like it or not, there’s no bigger turn-off to most ladies than inviting them over for some Halo or Madden.

The same isn’t true for board games. Even if you don’t enjoy them, there are a number of classic board games you should own if your ultimate objective is to endear yourself to a cool chick. For one thing, playing a board game is a plausible, non-creepy reason to hang out in private. Also, it’ll separate you from the men with whom she’s been on dates recently. Lastly, she will likely have fun — and you just might too.

Non-digital, human contact. How quaint!

So, what are the best board games to play with a woman on a date?

1) Scrabble

"ZQFMGB isn't a word! It doesn't even have a vowel!" - Hobbes

Women like smart, literate guys. If you can hold your own in Scrabble, you'll impress her. While a game can take a long time, it's nice to play a game at a slow pace that allows for discussion. Your word choices will inspire great conversation. But beware: if you take too long each turn, she will view you as indecisive and perhaps stupid. So make sure you're well-practiced and it will be a great time, and it'll give you reason to ask her to play Words with Friends with you in between dates.

2) Trivial Pursuit

"I'm proud to be Canadian. We may not have a fancy NFL team, or Prince, but we invented Trivial Pursuit—you're welcome, Earth." - Robin Scherbatsky

Contrary to popular belief, success at Trivial Pursuit has nothing to do with intelligence. Instead, it has everything to do with popular culture knowledge and reasoning skills. Playing it on a date leads to endless conversation that will allow you to identify shared interests. A related option is to play pub trivia together at your favorite watering hole.

3) Poker

"I will splash the pot whenever the fuck I please." - Teddy KGB

While this isn't technically a board game, it belongs in this discussion. If you're an expert and she's a novice, it's a fun game to teach, and it will usually impress. If you're both competent -- and competitive -- its super fun. Make sure you have poker chips, or, better yet, a jar full of change. Play for keeps, and have a good time. But beware: making a suggestion or joke about strip poker will be tempting, but allow her to be the one to do it.

4) Yahtzee

"How long does this game go on for?" - Eric Northman

An extremely underrated game. It's easy to play, and it quickly becomes addictive and competitive. You can play for twenty minutes or three hours, so it allows for plenty of flexibility. Also, unlike the other games mentioned so far, it's nearly impossible to get frustrated or argue over this classic dice game. Don't sleep on Yahtzee.

5) Battleship

"You sunk my battleship!" - Jasper Beardly

Even though the recent film adaptation was unnecessary and stupid, Battleship is an excellent game. Like Yahtzee, it's surprisingly fun and easy, and it's unlikely to lead to any conflict or hurt feelings. There's a certain quiet intimacy to Battleship that's perfect on a date. Show her you have basic reasoning skills and sink her battleship.

Other Games

"The Ukraine is Weak!" - Cosmo Kramer

While there are other good options that just missed the cut -- like Connect Four -- it's worth mentioning a few bad ones. Stay away from Chess because it's a mood killer. Unfortunately, same usually goes for Risk. Monopoly and Clue almost made the list, but they're both snoozers for just two players. And if you own Twister, put it out to the curb right now. There are also plenty of more modern board games that can fit the bill, but that's for a separate discussion.

Final Words of Wisdom

Cheesy, but she'll eat it up.

Remember: don't be too competitive, acknowledge the quirkiness of the games, offer up some good drinks and music, and have fun. If you don't currently own any such games, go buy old copies of them from your local thrift store. You won't be sorry.