Five Better Names For Katie Couric’s New Talk Show

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I don’t watch daytime talk shows because I don’t have a vagina, but I’m fully aware lots of people do. With some broad named Winfrey exiting stage left earlier this year, every dude and dudette with a career in broadcast news is throwing their hat in the ring of what constitutes a battle royale for the right to seize the title of king or queen of daytime television. It’s seasoned vets like Ellen and Maury going head-to-head with rookies like Anderson Cooper and Katie Couric, among others.

Couric, whose show won’t premiere until the fall of 2012 on ABC, has settled on a name for her show. It shall be called… Katie. Geesh, she really climbed out on a limb there, eh? She went with her first name just like all those other hacks. Yawn.

I like Katie, so I took the liberty of conjuring five alternate titles that I feel will separate her from the very competitive pack. And here they are.

5) Evening News Dropout 

4) The Toothy Grin Show

3) Couric’s Colon

2) The Perky Princess

1) Oprah 

Number one might land her in some legal hot water, but the others are sound as a pound. You can thank me later, Katie.