Four Ways to Show Your Lady How Boss You Are
We don’t know about you guys, but we like to impress our women. We’re always looking for new ways to let her know how boss we are. We recommend you do the same.
There are particular things that a woman will always go for, no matter what her cultural upbringing or so-called ‘preferences’. Certain actions lead to certain results. With the invaluable advice offered here you can be sure that your lady friend always perceives you as an awesome alpha-male pimp-daddy.
Brag About Your Accomplishments
There’s nothing a lady likes more than to hear all about her man’s grand and courageous accomplishments. Aim to spend a good portion of each day discussing all of the ways in which you have grown as a person and changed the world.
Try to avoid work accomplishments. They are getting kind of old. Instead, talk about the time you squirrel-suited off a mountain. That will get her dripping. Travel stories work well. If you don’t have any, just browse Lonely Planet for an hour and make some up.
Win Big at the Casino
Everybody knows that women love money. If you already have loads of it, then you will likely be swimming in lady bits, but if not you can get around this by creating the illusion that you have it. In the short-term, this can be accomplished by overspending in her company, but this is not wise for your wallet.
Instead, take her to a fancy casino and spill a bit of cash on a roulette wheel. The thrill of the game will get her going, but here’s the kicker; whether you win or lose, simply shrug your shoulders and walk away as if none of it matters. If you can’t be bothered going through all of this effort, you can play poker sitting at home and give the same effect.
Get in a Fight
These days everyone pretends that it isn’t cool to be macho, but really it is. The sweaty and edgy atmosphere of a bar fight can really get your lady pumping for a different kind of action.
Pick your moment carefully. You don’t want to start on a dweeb, as this will show you up to be a pussy. At the same time, someone considerably larger or tougher will have your girl dripping for the wrong person. You must win the fight to have her melting in your arms.
A true boss knocks an equal-size but unsuspecting opponent off their barstool before they even have chance to ‘look at your bird funny’.
Crash an Exotic Sports Car & Walk Away
Our final recommendation will seal the deal, no matter how chubby or undesirable you are. It contains all of the deep psychological techniques of previous recommendations, all wrapped into one haphazard ‘incident’.
Here’s what you need to do. Take out a loan on a very expensive sports car. Drive your lady around in it for a few weeks so that she knows how much you like that car. Take it out for a drive to a far-out place – alone. Now, crash the car at a high-speed into a barrier or wall!
The trick is to walk away from the car accident. If you are left paralyzed, you can let the paramedics take you to hospital, but if not you should walk home (or get a taxi to the bottom of your street if it’s too far.) Turn up at the door, torn and ragged after the accident, and stumble in to the living room.
Sit back and watch as your lady friend melts into a sloppy pile on the floor. You are truly a hero now! Enjoy it!