Last Night on Game of Thrones…

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It’s over? Already? Rats! In my version of a perfect world, shows like Game of Thrones, Breaking Bad, Community, The Walking Dead and Boardwalk Empire air on a 24-hour, seven-day, 365-day loop. That’s utopia, for someone like myself who puts way too much stock in fictional characters on a small screen (is 42-inches still considered small?). Alas, my twisted brain isn’t behind the wheel. Instead, we are all at the mercy of short seasons and long hiatuses. Bummer. Where was I? Oh right, the season 2 finale of Game of Thrones, entitled “Valar Morghulis.” Was it as awesome as last week’s awesomeness? No, but prime rib makes an excellent substitute for filet mignon.

  • The transition from Tyrion’s sad, ruined face to the shot of fresh dung evacuating from Tywin’s horse pretty much encapsulates how far the Imp has fallen.
  • “For your trouble.” Ouch. Pycelle is a real douche.
  • Look out, House Tyrell are now legit players in the “Game.”
  • Some advice for Sansa: don’t trust Baelish. He kinda sorta is responsible for your daddy’s death.
  • The union between Lord Varys and Ros strikes me as peculiar, but Varys is a master schemer, so he must have grand plans for the big-breasted whore.
  • The Jamie/Brienne scenes just keep getting better and better. Methinks the Kingslayer is beginning to see the Amazonian in a different light.
  • “Two quick deaths?” And one excruciatingly slow one.
  • Stannis knows how to choke a bitch.
  • Melisandre is quite the seductress. Still not sure what her end game is.
  • Theon needs a hug. Badly.
  • Was anyone else reminded of Samuel L. Jackson’s speech in Deep Blue Sea when Theon’s  motivational tirade was cut short? “Thought he’d never shut up.” Hilarious.
  • “I like it more than anything I’ve done.” Tyrion’s tearful plea to stay in the Seven Kingdoms and continue playing the “Game” was telling. All he wants it to be accepted.
  • Oooh, secret weddings!
  • “Valar morghulis.” Jaqen H’ghar is the shit. He and Arya would make a deadly duo.
  • MILK OF THE PUPPY!!!
  • Bye, bye Winterfell.
  • As expected, the House of the Undying lived up to its mysterious billing.
  • KHAL DR0AGO BACK IN DA HOUSE!
  • “Dracaras.” Do not fu*k with the Mother of Dragons. Daenerys absolutely owned this episode.
  • The Jon Snow stuff did nothing for me this season. I still dig the character, but he needs to be doing more than walking. I foresee that changing in Season 3.
  • “Time to meet the King Beyond the Wall.” Yes, it is.
  • Ha-ha, Xaro Xhoan Daxos. Suck it!
  • Sheesh, there sure are a lot of White Walkers roaming around.

Overall, I’d give Season 2 a solid B+. It took a while to get going, but the last two installments really ramped up the action and drama. Will Tyrion rebound from his demotion? What will become of Robb Stark’s army now that Winterfell is gone? What’s the deal with Stannis and his witch? Can Daenerys make it across the Narrow Sea? Is the Night’s Watch totally screwed? Sadly, we have to wait another year to find out. Until then…