Oodles of Captcha Hilarity

facebook captcha 300x256Everyone knows what CAPTCHA is, right? You go to those sites where, after already filling out far too much info just to see Tila Tequila in the buff, and the last thing you have to do is prove to the system that you aren’t some kind of mechanical robotic android. And there, right before you can click on ‘Complete’, or ‘Enter the Porn’ is a little box containing a series of words that you have to seamlessly and perfectly reproduce within the given space to move on on to the sweet, sweet nudity. It’s basically a coded nut shell, if you think about it. But the best part, however already irritating this final step to freedom is, is the ability to switch the two given words randomly and arbitrarily ad infinitum without ever getting the same combinations twice. And trust me, sometimes you get handed the most bizarre and wacky duo of words you can imagine. So, I spent a good hour on the task and managed to find quite the interesting groups. Enjoy!


This sounds like some kind of really horrible criminal in the Maryland Mafia. Let’s call Baltimore Gerry, he’s good for a laugh.

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The vacation destination for all of the discerning and upper-class hobos.

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This is like a little corner of a brochure. You’re not sure where it’s from, but they have a Bed and Breakfast.

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Just in case you need to breed several more Jacobs.

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“Sir, it appears the US has finally snapped and officially elected a fruit to the White House… no, an actual FRUIT.”

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You’ve never seen Horror like this in a theater before. Coming soon, from David Cronenberg…

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Please, Chuck… I’m begging you! Put down the pitchfork!

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1/4 nagging, 1/4 bitching, 1/4 frustration = my wife (rim shot).

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This is many city police-men’s criteria for driving after an evening at the bar.

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So you’re my new proctologist?

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“Have you SEEN our new neighbors? Good Lord!” “I know, I’ve already given them a comical nickname.”

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The next best day after Casual Friday.

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“Hello class, and welcome to Kindergarten! Oh, and before I go on, I’d like you to avoid one child at all costs.”

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These are Tripods you’d see in Rapper’s houses.

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“Sorry kids, Grandad’s become severely insane.”

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“So, according to your resume, you’ve been in Porn before… good, good, did you have a stage name?”

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It’s not that she can’t sit still, it’s just that she’s got worms. And there’s the jokes.

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When you love contrived gimmicky humor so very much.

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That’s mad skills, homes.

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Ya know, for when you break your pompoms.

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“And furthermore, if you intend on swearing, there is a designated spot for that, too.”

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“Have you met Dan, the guy from the bar the other night?” “Yeah, he cupped my balls. He seems, I don’t know, fluttery?”

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Cheapest Hookers in Town!

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“Dude, drop the whisk. It doesn’t have to go down this way, it was just a souffle!


The long forgotten Boy Scout Merit Badge.


“Hey, lemme show ya to my brudder. He can handle anything. His name is Stanley…”