Three Reasons Thor is the Dumbest Avenger


With The Avengers starting to fade from memory, it’s safe to say 90% of people reading this will have seen it; the other 10% just wanted to see Chris Hemsworth’s face up close, and we’re okay with that. Thor is a being with literal god-like powers, although being a god doesn’t mean you’re smart. Here are three ways the God of Thunder screwed up in The Avengers movie. In case it needed to be made clearer, the following contains SPOILERS.

1. Nearly killed Captain America

One of the first big set pieces is a fight between Thor, Iron Man and Captain America. It should be noted Thor is a being with unlimited strength who's well aware of how fragile the human form is. After punching armor-plated Robert Downey Jr. in the face for two minutes straight, Captain America arrives and tells Thor to cut that shit out. Fair enough, he does it by throwing his shield at Thor's face. But we have to point out that Thor is invincible, and that his reaction is a little over the top.


Beating this human to death in the forest will show I care about humanity.

Seriously Thor, that's how you react to being asked to not murder someone? By flying through the air to smash someone in the dome with your magical hammer. Come on Thor, that's how serial killers react to criticism, not superheroes. Luckily Chris Evans is carrying the only item in the entire Marvel Universe that cannot be damaged by Thor's hammer, but Thor didn't know that. Cap was just some guy, there's no way Thor could have known that the thing he was hitting was capable of deflecting his blow, since nothing he's ever encountered before has ever done that, ever. Even if he saw him raise his shield, what did Thor honestly expect would happen? Everything he's ever hit with that hammer was reduced to a stain of brain matter. All Cap asked him to do was stop punching someone, which isn't that much to ask considering he promised to be Earth's ally in his last movie.

Then again, it did look pretty bad-ass when he did it.


2. Could have stopped Hulk, but didn’t

The second big fight scene is between Thor and one of the few Marvel characters who he can go toe to toe with, Hulk. There's no point arguing about who should have won, because the answer is simple. Thor could have ended the fight in seconds. All he needed to do was use Mjolnir, the magical hammer that he and only he can lift.


Hulk can't lift it, what a pussy.

We clearly see that the Hulk can't lift it. He has been known to lift it in the comics, but only when massively enraged. At this point in the film, the Hulk is only mildly annoyed, hence nowhere near the anger levels needed to lift Mjolnir. Thor sees this and keeps punching him. Why didn't he just place Mjolnir on the Hulk's chest? You know, the exact tactic he uses to stop Loki in his own movie.


For a trickster god with the power to see the future, I should have seen this coming.

Say the Hulk stopped him, or he wasn't quick enough; that doesn't stop the fact that Mjolnir is controlled by Thor's mind. What was stopping him from beating the Hulk from the other side of the room, or flying it directly into his chest and out the window they were stood next to? The same one a human being without the ability to fly or fart lightning ends up luring him out of anyway. Seriously, the window is like eight feet away from where they were fighting.


To be fair, that fighter pilot had it coming.

3. Forgets his ability to power up Iron Man

One of the final scenes sees Iron Man risk his life by flying through a wormhole to punch an alien warship in the face with a nuclear missile. However, all of the drama in that scene could have been completely negated if Thor remembered the fact he has the ability to power up Iron Man's suit to beyond 400% capacity.


"Thanks for shooting me in the face with lightning" - Iron Man, apparently.

At no point during the final scene does Thor attempt to do this, even though he knows it will work and that he can summon lightning at will. Scratch that, Thor has unlimited control over Earth's weather, so why didn't he have bolts of lightning constantly zapping the shit out of Iron Man as he flew around? Scratch that, why didn't he have bolts of lightning constantly zapping the shit out of EVERYTHING! Don't tell us he couldn't do that, because he's the god of thunder, he can do whatever he wants. The only explanation is that Thor is actually just really, really stupid, which thinking about it, explains why he punched everything instead of using his magical god-like powers.