Top Ten Fictional Chefs

chefs articleThere’s any number of ways this list can be ordered, but Gunaxin chooses the route of who actually makes the best food, from worst to best, all involving the most lovable fictional chefs out there.

swedishchef460 75x7510. Swedish Chef (Jim Henson and Frank Oz – The Muppet Show)

This is my favorite Muppet by far, but I’m not sure if he’s ever made anything that is actually edible. See Gunaxin’s Tribute to the Swedish Chef.

images12 75x759. Jerome “Chef” McElroy (Isaac Hayes – South Park)

Isaac Hayes, may he rest in peace, really struck gold when he got to do the voice of this character, who dished out all kinds of advice, particularly about making love to women, to the children of South Park, Colorado. It’s too bad it ended badly, and then Parker and Stone killed off the character. Hayes died soon after. As for the Chef character, he worked in an elementary school cafeteria. Must’ve made one hell of a tater tot.

images13 75x758. Samurai (John Belushi – Saturday Night Live)

This one speaks for itself.

images14 75x757. Casey Ryback (Steven Seagal – Under Seige)

Any time you mix martial arts with cooking, you’ve got my interest. Just a note – I realize Jackie Chan once played a chef in 1997’s Mr. Nice Guy, but that film sucked so bad it made me not only want to stop practicing martial arts, but never eat again.

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6. Roadblock (Kene Holliday and Steve Blum – G.I. Joe)

Roadblock wanted to be a gourmet chef, but instead joined the army, with a primary function as a heavy machine gunner. Even better… like all great black cartoon characters, Roadblock often speaks in rhyme.

images27 75x755. Jack Tripper (John Ritter – Three’s Company)

Like Farrah Fawcett, John Ritter’s death was also overshadowed by the death of a music legend – Johnny Cash. I bet you didn’t know that.

images17 75x754. Monica Geller (Courtney Cox – Friends)

Incidentally, I wanted to do a post about the Top Ten Hottest Chefs ever, but the list began and ended with Geller.

images18 75x753. The Soup Nazi (Larry Thomas – Seinfeld)

Can anyone name another character ever who appeared on only one episode (excluding the cameo in the finale) of a show and became such a hit? This guy was actually based on a real character in New York, a guy named Al Yeganeh. “No soup for you!” Note: Frank Costanza was also a chef while he served in Korea.

images19 75x752. Artie Bucco (John Ventimiglia – The Sopranos)

The chef and owner of Nuovo Vesuvio served as a sometimes critical, and often comical purpose on The Sopranos, and this is one character that David Chase didn’t over or under-do. Just a note – before the episode aired, I correctly predicted that Tony and Artie would be living together after Tony’s separation from Carmella. The only thing I wished would transpire – that Artie would take Tony’s advice and go see Dr. Melfi. Imagine that scene.

images20 75x751. Remy (Patton Oswalt – Ratatouille)

I hear the groans, but let me tell you, the first 12 times I watched Ratatouille, I was drooling over that dish he serves to the food critic Anton Ego at the end, and I was dying to try it for myself. What I would do for someone to cook it for me. I’m not even sure what it is (some kind of baked squash? I don’t know), but if Ego liked it, then I know I would love it. MMMMMMMMMMMMM.